10 Reasons Why Sarah Palin Got Fired From Fox News

Sarah Palin can now see the unemployment line from her house. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I’ve just learned that Fox News Channel did not renew the contract with former Vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin.  Now would I stoop so low as to mock someone who has been a has-been for years and kick them while they’re down?  You betcha!  So, here are 10 reasons why Fox News fired Sarah Palin.

1)  Palin got fired by Fox to prove that she is not a quitter.

2)  Sarah was caught lip-syncing her rebuttal to Obama’s inauguration speech.

3)  Compared to the new crop of conservatives, Sarah Palin is starting to sound like a liberal.

4)  She wanted to spend time with her family, and find out which reality TV shows they could get her on.

5)  People started referring to Palin as “that Tina Fey look-alike”.

6)  Fox News may not care about Sarah Palin intellectual abilities, but they’ve certainly started to notice that she isn’t getting younger or prettier.

7)  There were allegations of Palin doing the news-cycling using Performance Enhancing Drugs.

8)  This was the only way for Palin to find the time to finally read her best-selling book.

9)  The network position of “Former Republican Vice-Presidential Candidate Beaten In the Last Election” now rightfully belongs to Paul Ryan.

10)  That’s the only way Palin can still get on the news today.

Well, what’s your favorite reason?  Me, I like all of ‘em!

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About List of X

An Ostensibly Funny Commentary* of the Recent News and Events. (* warning! may not actually be funny or a commentary. Also, since I am not quite sure what "ostensibly" means, it might not be "ostensibly" either.) Also blogging at listofx.wordpress.com
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40 Responses to 10 Reasons Why Sarah Palin Got Fired From Fox News

  1. Laura says:

    I don’t care one way or another about Fox firing Sarah Palin, as long as they keep that one perpetually confused-looking blonde woman who keeps showing up in clips on the Daily Show.

    • List of X says:

      Not having watched Fox (but plenty of Daily Show), I think I know who you are referring to. Yes, it would be a shame to lose her, and I am starting to worry for her because she’s only a couple years younger than Palin. Though even then the Daily Show shouldn’t have a problem finding footage of other confused-looking Fox anchors.

      • They are almost all blond models too – I sometimes see Fox by force when waiting in the doctor’s office. I’m thinking they employ so many dippy but needlessly angry blonds because it’s more entertaining for Republicans to take bullshit from an attractive female.

  2. fatherkane says:

    Spewed coffee with #7. Somehow the phrase ‘Performance Enhancing’ and Sarah Palin just don’t go together.

  3. mhasegawa says:

    My fav is #6 because there is truth in that. She’s not going to be so hot in a few years, and even when they keep those old guys who don’t look so great themselves.

    • List of X says:

      Yes, Fox only hires below-average looking old guys and Victoria Secret models, and Palin has now entered that time frame where she can’t be mistaken for either.

  4. stephenpruis says:

    #8 is priceless. Finally she would have an answer for that damned Katie Couric!

    • List of X says:

      I don’t think Palin wants to have an answer for Couric. One of the reasons she went to work on Fox is probably so that she’d never have to talk to anyone outside of Fox.

  5. You have to admire Fox’s loyalty. I’m surprised they haven’t harvested her organs.

    • List of X says:

      They could have, but they probably figured out that transplant of any one of her organ is not such a good idea – this organ could quit or go rogue at any time.

  6. twindaddy says:

    Shouldn’t all of them have read, “Because she’s stupid?”

  7. Kylie says:

    6– because it’s probably true!!

  8. Hard to pick just 1!!

  9. Matthew says:

    Has Sarah Palin spent more time by now as a reality TV figure than she has in politics? I actually thought she had more staying power as a broadcast blowhard than has proven true.

  10. favorite? #6, and add “or blonder”.

  11. The Hook says:

    #1, #2 and #5 are all pretty kick-ass!
    Great job!

  12. bernasvibe says:

    **IF I get started on this topic it will be hard to get me OFF of it..I can be ugly when it comes to Palin (and I hate being ugly!) so since I’ve nothing nice to say…But, loved your list ! 2 thumbs UP

  13. lexsborgia says:

    1, 2, 9. #2 is very good. No need4u2fear repercussions: she can’t read either.

  14. The high level of interest in her candidacy was reflected in the volume of coverage that went her way. The authors found that the average number of stories a day in overall coverage was 36 for Palin, compared with 14.9 for Biden. On television, Palin was the subject of 8.8 stories a day compared with 4.6 for Biden; in newspapers, it was 15 compared with 8.2 stories a day, and on political blogs , 14.2 compared with 3.2 stories a day.

  15. Pingback: ZAPRUDERS SARAH PALIN « The Age of Blasphemy

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