10 Reaction To Results Of 2014 Elections

Last Tuesday, United States followed a time-honored tradition of expressing dissatisfaction with one politician who isn’t up for re-election by voting against completely different politicians – or, as it’s normally called, “a mid-term election”. As a result of this disastrous for Democrats election, Republican captured the majority in the Senate and won larger majority in the House of Representatives than they had in decades – which will leave president Barack Obama mostly vetoing legislation rather than signing it into law. Here are 10 reactions to the results of the election.

1)  Mitch McConnell, presumed new Senate majority leader: “Now that the Republican party controls the Senate, I pledge to work more closely with president Obama and block even more of his agenda.”

2)  Harry Reid, former Democratic Senate majority leader: “From 2008 to 2014, Republican minority has been filibustering everything in the Senate, and we’re looking forward to finally put into good use everything Republicans taught us about the filibuster.”

3) Ted Cruz, Republican Senator: “We had 50 unsuccessful votes to repeal Obamacare in the House, and due to intransigence of Harry Reid, the Senate never once voted on these bills. Now that we have a majority in the Senate, we’re looking forward to finally having 50 Senate votes to repeal Obamacare.”

4)  Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon.com: “According to our data, for some unknown reason, in the last few days on our site the most-searched-for product has been ‘veto pens’.”

5) Fox News: “This election is a clear repudiation of Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, and Chelsea Clinton, in case she decides to run in 20-30 years.”

6)  Steve Ricchetti, Chief of Staff of Vice President Joseph Biden: “This is just a one bad election, Mr. Vice President. Now please, please, I beg you, step away from that ledge!”

7)  Reince Priebus, Republican party chairman: “I think the presidential hopeful Senator Ted Cruz is a biggest winner in this election. Compared to some new people elected this Tuesday, he now seems a perfectly sane and rational candidate.”

8)  President Barack Obama:  “Judging by the results of this election, I now know that I can make any Democratic politician do whatever I want by threatening to come to their state and campaign for them.”

9)  Nate Silver, election expert: “I think voters are tired of gridlock. And what better way for voters to demonstrate that they are tired of gridlock than by overwhelmingly voting to increase the minimum wage in their states while electing as governor the worst possible candidate to let that increase happen?”

Joe, average registered voter: “I didn’t vote because I think both parties are equally bad. I don’t remember their exact names, but I’m pretty sure they are all the same.”

About List of X

An Ostensibly Funny Commentary* of the Recent News and Events. (* warning! may not actually be funny or a commentary. Also, since I am not quite sure what "ostensibly" means, it might not be "ostensibly" either.) Blogging at listofx.com
This entry was posted in Humor, List of 10, Satire and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to 10 Reaction To Results Of 2014 Elections

  1. Sadly; For the first time; I don’t think your post is funny. Just Very; Very; Sad.
    Sorry. I laugh at almost everything at some point but I just can’t work up the chuckle for this one. Damn. I must be getting old.

    Like

  2. Carrie Rubin says:

    Yep, the next couple years should be interesting. The news pundits are already rubbing their hands together in anticipation, I’m sure.

    Like

  3. Paul says:

    Sad but true.

    Like

  4. Paul says:

    As an aside X, i did two guest posts this week past and I would be honored if you had the time to drop by: one was at Cordelia’s Mom http://cordeliasmomstill.com/2014/11/06/serendipity-guest-post-by-paul-curran/ and the other t Mindful Digressions http://mindfuldigressions.com/2014/11/06/of-breasts-and-bananas/comment-page-1/#comment-20676 thanks so much X.

    Like

  5. I should not have even *liked * this. So…I’m taking it back.

    Like

I can see you have something to say...