Instead of walking away from the Paris deal, Donald Trump is riding away from the deal instead, because walking is too taxing and produces too little CO2.
Last week, Donald Trump has announced that the United States will no longer honor the agreement to reduce the greenhouse gas emissions which the world’s countries reached in Paris in 2015. The agreement had aimed to limit the global temperature increase to 1.5 degrees Celsius above the pre-industrial levels, and in his speech, president Trump blasted the deal as both draconian and non-binding, which apparently makes it especially devious. Here are 10 reasons why Trump administration is leaving the agreement.
1) America doesn’t measure temperatures in centigrade, so a global warming of 1.5C wouldn’t apply to us.
2) With Donald Trump being in charge of America’s nuclear weapons, a nuclear winter is more probable than the global warming.
3) Last few days have been unusually cool, so clearly the global warming must already be over.
4) Since Air Force One is burning tons of fuel to ferry Donald Trump back and forth to his Florida resort every week, the US can’t possibly meet any kind of CO2 emission standards.
5) If the United States remains committed to lowering its greenhouse emissions, other countries will enjoy an unfair economic advantage of not being flooded by the rising seas.
6) When Trump made a deal with the Air conditioner maker Carrier to save hundreds of jobs last year, he promised Carrier a much warmer climate to increase the demand for air conditioners.
7) Trump towers are so tall that Donald Trump doesn’t care about any rising sea levels.
8) Trump has promised that he will negotiate a much better climate deal directly with the CO2.
9) China and India are going to cheat on the agreement anyway – and Trump’s “America First” motto means that America should get to do that first.
10) Trump’s Education Secretary Betsy DeVos has calculated that 1.5 degrees is a really small angle and no one would even notice it anyway.
List of X 
Number 4 is probably closest to the truth.
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My hope that it is closer to the truth than number 2.
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Indeed
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Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
… and don’t doubt at all that these may be his ‘actual reasons’… good one! 🌏
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Good post, as always! I’ve been missing you! Glad to see you here! 😄
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Thank you! I’m happy to know that you still have not forgotten my blog after such a long absence. 🙂
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I never have! I’m always looking for more List of X … 🙏🏽
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Another possibility: Leaving the accord may divert attention from the surge in the White House’s electrical use after its gym was converted to tanning beds.
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On the other hand, they probably still haven’t figured out how the White House light switches work, so that may still translate into net electrical savings.
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#1 and #10 are brilliant! Tip top form!
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#1 and #10? So it’s both top and bottom form. 🙂
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So what’s wrong with warm weather? Trump is gonna give us the greatest weather in the world. He and Besty DeVos have it all figured out. We’re gonna get some nice warm weather, while the rest of the world freezes.
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Nothing’s wrong with warm weather. Warm weather is beautiful. Just yesterday, it was 48F (that’s 9C for you losers still stuck with the Paris deal) day temperature around here, and today, thanks to the efforts of president Trump, it’s already sunny and 70F.
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Just think, even though we live 50 miles inland from the beach, if the sea levels keep rising from global warming we’ll have a valuable beachfront property without having to move!!
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Human developers have been working hard over hundreds of years at raising global temperatures. Just when the prize seems to be in sight, we can’t let bureaucratic agreements like the Paris Accord get in the way. Nothing, just nothing gets in the way of human development. Finally there is an American Prez who gets it.
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We can’t stop, not while there are still trees suitable for making furniture and yachts, and mountains and hills that can be mined for something.
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You forgot to mention that he was only elected to serve the citizens of Pittsburgh. I have no idea who’s running the rest of the country, though.
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I hear it’s some guy named Vladimir.
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I like him. When he says, “Don’t worry, be happy,” it gives me hope for our future.
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Well, it’s about time. Months between posts? Do you hate us?
I know the way around this. We need to think up a way to make it look like Trump came up with the idea for a climate accord. All he cares about is glory and ceremony. If we can give it to him while saving the planet, what’s the harm? I can’t be the only one who thought of this angle, can I?
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That’s actually has a very good chance of working. The UN should have organized a sword dance and a shiny orb touching for him to make him feel important.
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Once again you skate that thin edge between funny and scary… nuclear winter… yeah… you are a mad genius.
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Predicting a nuclear winter as an outcome of Trump presidency doesn’t make me a mad genius, it just makes me a little pessimistic.
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The truth is both funny and scary, but you just have a way of pointing that out.
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Amazingly, I had the Celsius idea in my head, then pow … #1! …. #8 is awesome, and #10 got the biggest chuckle.
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#11. Donald Trump is full of hot air and he hates competition
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The White House Bugged:
“Donald, honey. You be the Pope and I’ll be a nun.”
“…Hey, it’s working…it’s working!…”
“…The Lord is my shepherd…”
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No 10 takes the cake – ignorance at the highest level.
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No 1 – bwahaha! Nice to see your wit on display again.
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So many great points! Thanks for clearing that up for me. I hadn’t thought of centigrade. Of course!
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And that’s after you just went to Europe, the centigrade capital of the world? 🙂
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Right?
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Would it be OK if I cross-posted this article to WriterBeat.com? I’ll be sure to give you complete credit as the auth4or. There is no fee; I’m simply trying to add more content diversity for our community and I enjoyed reading your work. If “OK” please let me know via email.
Autumn
AutumnCote@WriterBeat.com
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Sure, you can cross-post as long as you link back here.
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Funny but ouch!
Number three is my favourite.
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