10 Reasons Why Donald Trump Cancelled Pay Raises For Federal Employees

“The economy’s doing so well, look how much money I made in the past year!”
Image source: Daily Express

This week, president Donald Trump has announced that he will cancel a planned pay increase for all civilian federal employees. Here are 10 reasons why this was a tremendously smart decision.

1)  There’s really no point of giving raises to the people in Trump’s government, because, chances are, way too many of them are just going to quit or go to prison.

2)  He’s hired so many millionaires and billionaires to run his government, he doesn’t think people in the government need any more money.

3)  Trump doesn’t want his taxes to be wasted on the government bureaucrats, in case he ever decides to pay taxes.

4)  He expects other government workers to show the initiative and business acumen and turn their government jobs into side income and free perks, just like he and his cabinet members do.

5)  He wanted to punish government workers for constantly leaking mean things about him, but Ivanka convinced him that putting their children in cages is only acceptable for Mexicans.

6)  Trump only promised to hire the best people, not to pay them the best salaries.

7)  Government bureaucrats are already overpaid, because most of them are clearly incompetent, useless, and corrupt. Just look at Trump’s cabinet!

8)  Money doesn’t grow on trees, and those Mar-a-Lago trips and golf games are expensive, and the First Lady may soon need to be replaced with a newer and better model.

9)  Every dollar saved on federal spending is a dollar that can be given to billionaires as a tax cut, so that it will then trickle down from billionaires to multimillionaires.

10)  There just isn’t enough money for a raise, because Russian economy is in trouble.

P.S. According to more recent news, Donald Trump promised to study the pay freeze. By the end of the weekend, he is expected to either deny ever talking about any pay raises, or give himself an A+ after successfully completing his studying, or both.

Advertisements

About List of X

An Ostensibly Funny Commentary* of the Recent News and Events. (* warning! may not actually be funny or a commentary. Also, since I am not quite sure what "ostensibly" means, it might not be "ostensibly" either.) Blogging at listofx.com
This entry was posted in Humor, List of 10, Satire and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to 10 Reasons Why Donald Trump Cancelled Pay Raises For Federal Employees

  1. Trump doesn’t want a pay freeze. It sounds too much like some kind of climate change hoax.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Ankur Mithal says:

    He can raise only one important thing at a time. And apparently, raising Trump Inc stock prices is far more important than raising anything else at this time.

    Like

  3. Tippy Gnu says:

    Number 4 might be the most likely reason. The side jobs and perks would most likely be in the form of corruption and bribery. Underpaying government workers is the blueprint for corruption in other countries, so why should we lag behind the rest of the world?

    Like

  4. Dr. Rex says:

    Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    Stop, take a look … worth your while … 10 reasons!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. kingmidget says:

    I wonder when his supporters will realize that he only cares about the wealthy and that his vindictiveness knows no bounds. His tax cuts? I got an pay raise this year of about $7,000, my federal tax burden will go up by about $5,000, if my initial calculations are correct. So much for tax cuts assisting those below the 1%.

    Like

    • List of X says:

      Aren’t you coming up $2000 better than before, then?
      Although, I have a feeling that Trump had very little to do with your raise – even if he’d be quick to take the full credit for it.

      Like

      • kingmidget says:

        Sure I am, and yes he had nothing to do with my raise since I work in State government in one of the bluest states. My point is that under the old tax rules, the raise should have produced about a $1,000 increase in my taxes, not a $5,000 increase.

        Like

  6. Steve Ruis says:

    I suggest that this is too easy for one of your obvious skills!

    Like

  7. Elyse says:

    He wanted to give the DC suburbs entirely to the democrats. 😈

    Like

  8. Trent Lewin says:

    Ooooo, number 5… ouch. By the way, I’m pretty sure he didn’t want to give salary increases because he’s a feckless dick. But never fear, he is making us Canadians angry with his many insults and silly negotiation, so much so that we may soon invade on a fleet of moose. Be prepared.

    Like

  9. Who is going to provide all this great material when he leaves office? I don’t see anyone waiting in the wings in either party who’s half as entertaining or crazy as President Bonespur.

    Like

    • List of X says:

      It’s actually going to get easier when he leaves (if he leaves). I know it’s hard to believe, but quite a few times he said or did something outrageous, I start writing a list, then he says or does something else outrageous that grabs all the attention, so I drop the list I’ve started because no one cares about that topic anymore.

      Like

I can see you have something to say...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s