There has been a lot of speculation about whether people should wear masks to protect themselves and others from COVID-19 or shouldn’t, and scientists don’t really help, because they keep coming up with different answer seemingly every couple of weeks. Seriously, science, can’t you just pick one thing and just stick to it for the next couple thousand years, like religion does? Luckily, there are tens of millions of self-educated epidemiologists and Google-trained mask experts on Facebook, and from their combined wisdom here are 10 reasons why masks are bad for you.
1) Masks are reducing the flow of oxygen to your brain. Did you know that the air inside the mask is 78% nitrogen and only 21% oxygen?
2) Requiring people to wear masks is tyranny. What’s next, requiring people to wash their hands after going to the bathroom, and, speaking of which, going to the bathroom – in the bathroom?
3) Wearing masks makes it harder to engage in exercises such as running or bicycling: the mask straps push your ears forward, creating additional air resistance that requires you to apply additional effort to move forward.
4) They say that masks are easy to use, but, apparently, one does actually need 6 years of medical training to wear a mask properly – hey morons, when they say “social distancing”, they don’t mean your mask and your nose!
5) Wearing masks makes people look like sheep. Although… come to think about it, it’s the sheep who are never wearing masks.
6) They even require kids to wear masks, and kids are too small to wear masks! Can you imagine kids wearing mask, going from one place to another while wearing masks, hanging out with friends while wearing masks, talking to adults while wearing masks, getting snacks while wearing masks?! Okay, fine, but besides Halloween!?
7) The design of the masks is so diabolically terrible that the holes in the filters are simultaneously too big to stop the virus from going through and too small to allow a 1000 times smaller oxygen molecules to slip through.
8) It doesn’t matter that medical workers wear the masks for their protection, because medical workers are biologically different from the Real Americans.
9) Masks make your immune system 5 times weaker. So if you might get COVID-19 without a mask, if you are wearing a mask you’ll get COVID-95!
10) Masks do not protect from the virus. The best defense against a bad guy with a virus is a good guy with a virus.