This week, beverage maker Anheuser-Busch announced that Budweiser beer cans and bottles will be temporarily redesigned to replace “Budweiser” brand name with “America”. Here are 10 fun facts about this new America beer.
1) America beer will be made from bald eagles and apple pies, and filtered through 1000-thread count cotton American flags to attain its rich 1% flavor.
2) The beer will carry the name “America” up until the presidential election – which is the worst possible time to change the brand, because half the country would want a drink to celebrate, and the other half would want a drink to not have to deal with the election results while sober.
3) Islamic traditions prohibits America in every Middle Eastern country.
4) You don’t get drunk from America beer, but you can get too patriotic to drive. You may also experience some strange American dreams, but don’t worry, they’re not real.
5) Most people think America is the best beer in the world until they actually try some of the European ones.
6) The cans come with the slogan “Yes we can”.
7) Whenever America beer doesn’t agree with your system, the whole world suffers from the hangover.
8) Drinking America beer makes you more likely to operate heavy machinery like tanks, jet fighters, and aircraft carriers.
9) Certain people feel that only light beer can count as true America beer, and all kinds of dark beer are inherently inferior.
10) With just a bottle of America beer, you will now be able to see America literally going down the drain.