10 Things Jeb Bush Would Change In The Constitution With A Magic Wand


Jeb Bush using a magic wand to fix the Constitution and to make the U.S. Gross Domestic Product grow at 4% as he promised earlier.

Jeb Bush using a magic wand to fix the Constitution and to make the U.S. Gross Domestic Product grow at 4% as he promised earlier.

A couple of days ago, Jeb Bush, one of the leading Republican non-Trump candidates and a devoted admirer of the Constitution, had said in an interview, and I quote, “there are like 10 things I would change in the Constitution with a magic wand“. Since Governor Bush has pretty much written the post title for me, I feel like I should return the favor and help him change these 10 things he wants fixed in the Constitution. (Unfortunately, magic wands are currently out of stock at Amazon.com, so I had to use a magic marker instead). Here are 10 things Jeb Bush would magically change in the Constitution… although he might have gotten a little carried away in the process.

JebConst6

JebConst7

JebConst8

JebConst5

JebConst3

JebConst2

JebConst1

JebConst4

JebConst9

JebConst11

Although the signature section of the Constitution isn’t used to establish any laws, it would be fair to make some adjustments there, as well, so…

JebConst12

Since we’re fixing the Constitution already, is there anything else you want changed once Jeb gets his magic wand?

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About List of X

An Ostensibly Funny Commentary* of the Recent News and Events. (* warning! may not actually be funny or a commentary. Also, since I am not quite sure what "ostensibly" means, it might not be "ostensibly" either.) Blogging at listofx.com
This entry was posted in Humor, List of 10, Satire and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

95 Responses to 10 Things Jeb Bush Would Change In The Constitution With A Magic Wand

  1. Brilliant. A perfect summary of what the current GOP actually represents…

    Liked by 3 people

  2. mhasegawa says:

    He’s not taking away women’s suffrage? I’m shocked.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Scott Erb says:

    I actually found Trump’s suggested changes:

    Replace Article II, Section 1: “The chief executive of the United States will be the head of the Royal Family, also known as the House of Trump. His title shall be “President Trump.” He shall serve for life, unless he chooses to step down and pass leadership to the next in line. Succession goes to the first natural male child to the President or his designee, should he not have children. This is followed by other males born in the birth order. In case of there being no male children, the first female child should take on the role. If anyone takes the role not named Trump, he or she will change their name to assure there is only President Trump.

    Replace Article II, Sections 2-4: The President will be commander in chief of the armed forces, have the power to sign treaties, make appointments and run the national bureaucracy. The President can veto any legislative act; this veto cannot be overridden. If Congress refuses to act on a Presidential request for legislation within three weeks, the President can implement emergency legislation to bypass Congress.

    And add to Article III, Section 1: “In a case where the legal opinion of the Supreme Court and the President are in conflict, the President determines the meaning of the Constitution.

    Liked by 3 people

    • List of X says:

      I think there was also an amendment to the first paragraph that declared that the annual Miss America contest shall continue with the winner being selected as a suitable and fertile wife for President Trump for the period of up 1 year – should the winner be unable to perform her duties, she will be replaced with the 1st runner up, and so on.
      And there was a lot of mentions of beheadings, too…

      Like

  4. john zande says:

    This is brilliant! Let this go Viral!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Carrie Rubin says:

    Ha, awesome. Love the names you added in with the signatures.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Jim Wheeler says:

    Amendment VI: In all criminal prosecutions, except in cases of suspected terrorism, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial . . .

    Liked by 2 people

  7. This is my favorite of all your posts to date! Like Jon Stewart, turnin’ my frown upside down. 🙂

    Like

  8. Sherry says:

    excellent!

    Like

  9. oooOOOOooo!!!, Jeb Bush’s wand makes cool sparkles! I know who I’m voting for!

    Like

  10. Elyse says:

    YUP. You nailed it. Again.

    Like

  11. OMG, this was hilarious. I laugh, then I cry a little, then I hide under my bed. So ironic that someone from the party that worships the Constitution (in their own image) as much as the Bible, wants to change it to suit his needs. I wonder if he’d back the Bushian Bible too. Mark out all that crap about the poor and stuff.

    Liked by 1 person

    • List of X says:

      Yes, once they’re done with the Constitution, they should really fix the Bible, because what it says and what they practice are like two completely different religions.

      Like

  12. Paul says:

    Yikes! I hope our southern Neighbor doesn’t elect one of them there constitution changers. Very funny X.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Glazed says:

    The only Bush with a magic wand is George H.W. Bush. It magically produced an idiot son who actually became President.

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Well, that was sobering and true. Christ, is this what I need at 6:36 a.m.? The truth? That’s not why I come to the internet.

    I say bring back the crown. We are a sorry-ass country because we don’t have a king or queen. I follow the British monarchy news and it’s tremendous fun. A great distraction from the truth of my day. We need a king or queen. Can you red line that into the Constitution?

    Liked by 1 person

  15. aFrankAngle says:

    Oh my … this is classic. Love the way you did the changes with a pen. What a hoot! Meanwhile, interesting how Republicans (on one hand) call for returning to the roots & intent of the Constitution, then (on the other hand) call for amendments/changes.

    Off topic – No only thanks for your dialogue in my recent post … especially with Erik – but more importantly, for keeping it civil & on topic.

    Liked by 1 person

    • List of X says:

      Yeah, I find this approach to the Constitution at least somewhat hypocritical, but isn’t different from the Republican politicians’ approach to the Bible, or to family values, or to their reaction to the actions of Republican vs. Democratic officials. At least they’re consistent in their hypocrisy, I have to give them that much.

      Like

  16. goldfish says:

    I’m fond of adding “or something” at the end of constitutional amendments, too.

    Also, “We the corporations” made me very, very sad.

    Liked by 1 person

    • List of X says:

      I added “or something” because you don’t want to to make the Constitution too straightforward and restrict the Supreme Court too much from making up the rules as they go.

      Like

  17. It’s pretty sad when Bush’s mother said a couple of years ago when Jeb was talking about running: “I think there’s been enough Bush’s in the Whitehouse.” Even she’s tired of these guys.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. How about adding something like, “No President shall be removed from office till another suitable child/sibling or other heir is available to take over office”!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I like that you came right out and said the ‘white’ people… it needed to be said… they can’t pretend they don’t feel that way, but they do… it explains their animosity towards the sitting president.

    Like

  20. Gibber says:

    I think you should be the next president!

    Like

    • List of X says:

      I’m currently ineligible to become one, but you know what? with this magic wand, I can fix that!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Gibber says:

        Well then you’re all set and the US is about to
        1. Be shocked
        2.Get much better
        3. Be confused
        4. No longer have Obamacare
        5. Have the poor get rich and the rich think they’re poor
        6. Have cheaper booze
        7. Have no more war
        8. No more lying politicians
        9. Kiss you
        10. Ask for your autograph

        Like

  21. Trent Lewin says:

    Look X, I’m getting kind of worried. I generally lean on you for accurate representations of the madness inherent in your politics, but I’m a bit concerned that I’ve suddenly started to develop feelings for Mr. Bush. They’re not nice feelings – but what if he is a nice guy? What if he likes ice cream and fireworks? He can’t be a total revisionist tool, can he? Can he?

    Like

    • List of X says:

      It’s okay to have feelings, Trent. I think, according to research, people vote more with their emotions than with their brains anyway. I don’t know know about Jeb, but his brother seemed like a nice guy, and maybe really was, and that’s probably how he was elected, but he was probably utterly unqualified to run a country. And Jeb sounds like a slightly more polished version of George W.
      So in that context, maybe it’s better to think of Jeb as not a nice guy, that way we wouldn’t be disappointed.

      Like

  22. I am laughing down the inside of my thigh….thank you

    Like

  23. pegoleg says:

    Magic wand, magic marker – you work magic with either one.

    Like

  24. Totally brilliant post! Also I’m with Gibber- you should run for president! You’d have my vote (also my corporate sponsorship which would involve lots of chocolate brownies and dry ramen).

    Like

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