The 2016 election campaign has unofficially began, and several prominent politicians have been strongly hinting that they are going to run for president in 2016. Surprisingly, one of the people who decisively kicked of the “I’m-thinking-about-considering-the-launch-of-the-exploratory-process-of-starting-the-research-committee-to-evaluate-the-possibility-of-potential-involvement-in-a-presidential-run” game was the 2012 presidential contender Mitt Romney, one-term governor of Massachusetts and a lifelong one-percenter. This would be Romney’s third attempt, and he is planning to make poverty the focus of his campaign. Here are 10 reasons why Mitt Romney is running for president again.
1) Retirement is boring, and there doesn’t seem to be anything good on Netflix.
2) Mitt’s wife Ann had already bought some really nice curtains for the Oval Office in 2012, and it would be a shame to waste them.
3) Romney’s chances are much better in 2016 because unlike the last time, practically no one will vote for Barack Obama in 2016.
4) According to Fox News, it’s only because Romney didn’t become president that ISIS even exists, and if Romney were to run the country, ISIS would instantly disappear. If you don’t believe me, consider this: today Mitt Romney owns five or six houses, and there’s no ISIS in any of them.
5) Romney’s campaign theme of poverty reflects the fact that his own wealth dipped and a $400,000 presidential salary could really come in handy when paying off five different mortgages.
6) Mitt Romney would do all he can to help oil and coal companies and other CO2 producers, and right now, in the middle winter, global warming is starting to sounds like a pretty good idea.
7) His frequent flyer miles will expire unless he flies 1,000,000 miles by November 2016.
8) Compared to other campaign favorites Hillary Clinton (wife of president Bill Clinton) and Jeb Bush (brother of president George W. Bush), Mitt Romney does seem like a fresh new face.
9) Having already run multiple presidential campaign gave Mitt useful campaigning experience which will be even more valuable in 2016 – and even more valuable in 2020, 2024, 2028, 2032, 2036, and any future elections.
10) During his campaign, Mitt Romney promised to bring unemployment rate to 6% by 2016. If he managed to bring it down to 5.6% today while not even being elected, imagine how much further he could lower the unemployment rate if he were elected?